This review has been ‘repurposed’ from my other site, theOneliner.com

How necessary a film is this, the umpteenth version of Casanova to be made in some format or other? Well, put it this way, Sienna Miller is in it.

Not that we wish to imply that Sienna Miller is a waste of carbon or anything. Nah, we mean to state it rather boldly. In most sane societies she’d have been boiled down for glue long before now, so as to have given her life some small utility at least.

I will, however save the rest of this hateful ranting until my inevitable opinion column in the Daily Mail. Also in the firing line: Immigrant Labour Voting Drug Addicted Bingo Playing Single Mothers. As ever. You, however, are probably rather more interested in the motion picture event of whatever day you happen to see it, Casanova.

S’alright, I suppose.

I doubt I’m going to get away with that as a review, am I? Bah. Okay, womanising gadabout Casanova (Heath Ledger) male sluts his way around Venice assisted by his faithful manservant Lupo (Omid Djalili). While the Vatican’s Inquisitorial staff headed by Dalfonso (Ken Stott) take a dim view of such immoral debauchery and deflowering, they can do little while Casanova’s in the good graces of The Doge (Tim McInnerny), the Grand High Pubah round them thar parts at them thar times.

This status quo can’t last, although in a tragic irony Status Quo have lasted, inflicting their dadrock misery on untold millions. Where’s the justice? Anyway, the Ultimate Grand High Pubah of the times, the Pope is displeased with this state of affairs and dispatches feared Inquisitor Pucci (Jeremy Irons) to capture Casanova and also a dangerous philosopher Guardi who’s putting out troublesome pamphlets putting funny ideas into women’s heads, causing them to get ideas above their station and encouraging them to speak their mind and other such heretical things.

In a desperate attempt at respectability Casanova hastily arranges a marriage to the unsullied daughter of a well respected family. Wouldn’t you know it, no sooner than that happens does he fall in love with the spunky independent woman Francesca Bruni (Sienna Miller). Wouldn’t you know it, no sooner than that happens does the other half of her arranged marriage show up in the bulky shape of lard merchant Paprizzio (Oliver Platt). Wouldn’t you know it, no sooner than that happens Paprizzio falls for Francesca’s mother Andrea (Lena Olin). Wouldn’t you know it, Casa pretends to be Paprizzio to get into Francesca’s good graces. Wouldn’t you know it, Francesca turns out to be responsible for Guardi’s philosophies. Wouldn’t you know it, etc, etc, and before long everyone’s pretending to be everyone else and everyone’s in trouble with the Inquisition, and it’s generally not a good thing to be in trouble with the Inquisition.

As you may have gathered, this isn’t Casanova, the Dramatic Tales of Passion and Daring in a Time of Oppression and Capitalisation; it’s Casanova, the Rom-Com slash Farce slash Infrequent Swashbuckling and Mild Peril. And Capitalisation. Taken as a mildly farcical rom-com, Casanova s’alright, I suppose. If that statement didn’t suffice a few paragraphs ago I doubt it will here, so let’s plough on.

Heath Ledger, fresh from plaudits aplenty garnered by Gay Shepherd Mountain essentially slouches his way through this outing, but it’s a charismatic, likable slouch so it more or less works. Jeremy Irons proves to be hampered by a character that swings wildly between genuinely threatening, pantomime villainy and slapstick falldown merchant. Sienna Miller
THIS SECTION HAS BEEN CENSORED BY HER MAJESTY’S GOVERNMENT MINISTRY OF TRUTH FOR NON-COMPLIANCE WITH OBSCENITY LAWS. THOUGHTCRIME WILL NOT BE TOLERATED.
, which is about as much as you’d expect. Omid Djalili and Oliver Platt steal most of their scenes from the leads, and in fact almost of the supporting cast put in motivated, energetic turns that wind up being far more memorable than the folks you’re supposed to be concentrating on.

Jinkies. Sounds a bit grim, doesn’t it? Well, it’s not all that bad. It’s main trouble lies in attempting to add so many strings to its bow that it winds up misfiring completely. It’s a bit of a comedy, a bit of an action adventure, a bit of a romance and frankly, a bit of a mess. It has something of a design-by-committee feel to it, as though it’s looking to tick a number of boxes by hook or by crook. Casanova at times threatens to fly apart completely, but the lavish production design, amiable if not fantastic performances, a few reasonably good gags and a general air of well-meaning competence means that there’s enough good points contained in Casanova for it not to feel like a complete waste of time and effort.

Casanova‘s a pretty mediocre film all round really, making it difficult to either care about it very much or to recommend it to anyone. Still, if you stumble upon it or have nothing better to do it’s not an intolerable experience, even if it does have Sienna
THIS SECTION HAS BEEN CENSORED BY HER MAJESTY’S GOVERNMENT MINISTRY OF TRUTH FOR NON-COMPLIANCE WITH OBSCENITY LAWS. THOUGHTCRIME WILL NOT BE TOLERATED.